The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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