Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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