seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
