Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
We need to get me chipped asap
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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