"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize