If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
