Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
