Have you finally orgasmed yet?
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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