That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Randomize
