not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
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