Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
I just want to make out with him forever
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
