why didn't you poke me back
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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