They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Randomize
