I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
