the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
