She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
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