***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
