she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
