i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Randomize