their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
