after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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