Three words: puerto rican gang bang
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
he told me I talked like a deaf person
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
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