My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
