I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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