He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize