He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
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