Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
