Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
