turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Randomize
