During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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