dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
