i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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