she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
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