yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
