Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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