Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
It's rum buckets o'clock
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
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