I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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