He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
