I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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