I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
