So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Randomize
