She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
Randomize
