he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
