Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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