Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
