i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Randomize
