Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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