I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
her facebook's as public as her vagina
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
