Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
