So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
